Mind, Planning

Changing my mind(set)

I’ve always been a bit of an all or nothing kinda girl. This can be great to get started on something – I throw myself wholeheartedly into it, but then I run into problems when I don’t do all of it ‘just right’ or something unexpected comes up and I go ‘off plan’. Luckily I’ve become more aware of this trait, and talked about it a bit in some previous posts.

This time with Project 35, I’m trying really hard not to be quite so all or nothing. I want to focus on making small changes rather than huge all or nothing ones – regularly making better choices that will build on themselves – a focus on the *little things* if you will. I’m trying to plan for the unexpected, (don’t worry I know that’s a bit of a contradiction!) and to build in some ‘relaxed’ time within my plan. Generally allowing for drinking (alcohol) / eating (less healthy stuff) in the numerous very social situations I can come across. Living on a caribbean island means opportunities for experiences that you don’t want to turn down – I don’t know, sipping champagne in an infinity pool within an exclusive hotel on another island, for example (this was my Sunday just gone – yes I know you probably hate me right now). I don’t want to pass up on these experiences and feel like I’m missing out when I have the opportunity to do things like this.

Part of being my best me and growing as a person is to enjoy life and not feel like you’re missing out on the fun stuff. Now, that is not a free pass to eat and drink to excess on a regular basis! But it does mean that I need to incorporate these experiences into my plan – to allow for the flexibility to just ‘go with the flow’. And to not punish myself should I not stick to plan for whatever reason, but just get straight back into the plan. (Note to self/you – if your plan is to not have a plan for the evening / day / weekend it’s harder to punish yourself for going off plan as short of staying on plan you’d be sticking to the plan! Groundbreaking idea huh!! #thankmelater )

I’ve realised it is also about changing my mindset, particularly in relation to food and alcohol. Much easier said than done!
I’ve always had quite bad FOMO (fear of missing out) which would mean I would stay out later than I had planned / should have done to be amongst the ‘last crew standing’. Or drink more alcohol than I’d planned / should have / wanted to because others were. EVEN IF I DIDN’T WANT TO. Messed up huh?? Yup. You can easily end up drinking more drinks, more often, if you just go along with everyone else. And given I’m trying to improve my overall health (and ultimately cut calories) alcohol particularly isn’t great for me in a number of ways. As you get older, a) the hangovers hurt more and b) the hangovers hurt more. On the whole*, it’s just not worth the pain.

*but sometimes it is completely totally worth it, and it’s unexpected, hence needing some flexibility to go with the flow

Luckily my friends have been really supportive so far and understand why I’m not as much fun anymore (joke! I mean why I’m not drinking as much) Thanks guys!!

I don’t think I’ll ever get to a point where I don’t want to drink at all, I really like champagne and cocktails do taste better on a sunlounger (#sorrynotsorry , I don’t blame you for hating me now haha) but moderation is key 90% of the time. So I need to plan for that 10%.

In summary, there are two things I’m trying to get across:

  1. You need some flexibility in your plan so you don’t have to feel you’re going off plan, particularly if like me you’re all or nothing
  2. It is the little things that lead the way in successful change (more on this in another post!!)



Photo Credit: Ross Findon on Unsplash

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